Aww. I need more comments and subscriptions! LOL. Anyway.
And yes, whenever I blog and I can`t think of another title, I`ll just be writing the date.;)
Today was actually good. ALOT better than the past few days. Huge drama`s been going on in school since last week. And I`m actually one of the main people. Boooo.
And with great ranting comes great story-telling. So I`ll be telling what happened before I really blog about today.
So here it goes.
I`ve been fairly popular in my class. I talked and interact with almost everyone. I [used to] have really *ahem* “great”, “loyal” and “supportive” “friends” who “will never leave me behind and will always be there for me.” HAH. That`s why I put the quotation marks, dearies.
THOSE group of friends that I just mentioned were actually my best friends So yeah.
Our group was also close to this fairly popular group as well. This group was now made up of my close friends
So anyway. As the year progressed, my best friends didn`t really like one of the people in our close friends group. [That girl was actually the suspected “leader” of the group. Let`s call her Lucy.] Soon they started talking about her, and I was beginning to be influenced by what they kept saying about her, so I kind of began to not like her as well. And I thought that it was okay too for me start talking about her and stuff.
And Lucy knew about it.
Suddenly, Lucy and the people from her group started ignoring me. ME ONLY. It was kind of weird though. I asked for advice from my older friends, they told me stop focusing on the people who hate me, and be thankful from my real, true, best friends, who will definately never leave me.
That was definately good advice.
Too bad it didn`t work.
…because those “real, true, best friends” hated me as well.
And for what reason?
FOR GOSSIPING ABOUT LUCY.
WOW. I KNOW, RIGHT?
And I learned that Lucy`s group [my close friends group] told my best friends, and they got influenced and they hated me too.
LUCY`S GROUP DOESN`T EVEN KNOW, TO THIS DAY, THAT I`M NOT THE ONE WHO STARTED IT. THAT MY BEST FRIENDS, WHO THEY`VE GOTTEN UNBEARABLY CLOSE WITH SINCE THE WHOLE DRAMA WITH ME STARTED, ACTUALLY DESPISE LUCY.
Now that sucks, right?
Let me answer that. OF COURSE IT DOES. 😐
See how influence takes it all down?
But whatever. Anyway.
a really heartfelt apology.
and they had no reaction.
Yes, I did something. I ADMITTED IT. But I apologized. Now, it`s kind of their problem now that they won`t accept it.
So I was alone.
I make my way to the lunch table, alone.
Sat down, read a book, ate a burger, drank Fit n’ Right, [of-topic, but I`m seriously addicted to that drink now. Lol. Okay, focus,]
I actually enoyed being alone. It gave me time to reflect on things and it really gave me peace of mind.
Until I heard whispers just across my table.
It was them.
Making fun of me.
I`m like, whoa, respect please?
I couldn`t take it. After that, there were indirect adresses. You know, like someone who says something out loud, that`s obviously directed to you, but doesn`t say it is? Nevermind. Hope you`ll get it.
What hurt the most is that they turned almost all the friends I had against me. Including my best friends.
Well, My best friends were actually supposed to stick up for me, right? And not just sit there and absorb every single thing they said.
But anyway. I, again, sought help from my older friends. They said that they`re not supposed to be worth the stress <— SO TRUE. and that I should hang out with more people and form new friendships.
AND THAT`S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED TODAY.
I hung out with my other friends, and I had a blast. I really felt at home with them. I`m just so happy that I got to find other people who would actually care about and comfort me.
P.P`S LESSONS LEARNED:
- Love someone or hate someone, you`re still thinking about them. So don`t stress on thinking about those who you hate. There are, and will always be, people out there who you can run to.
- Influence is deadly. Either you just wanna fit in, or you don`t want to feel insecure around them, never let influence get in your way. Think about the situation like a real civilized human being.
- Never worry about tomorrow, today`s problems are enough. Yeap, I got that from the Bible. Lol. It`s pretty self-explanatory, so never look back or look forward, just be contented with where you are now.
- Learn to forgive yourself. Hey, we`re all human, we all mess up big, and shit happens. You can never change the past, so just live with it, beat it, and move on.
- EVERYTHING, whatever situation, whatever struggle begins, it will definately end. That didn`t happen yet on my case, but I`m confident that it will. It`ll be hard and it`ll take time, but I should just live life to the fullest and not worry.
LOL, that`s enough now. I don`t think I have enough time for blogging. Oh well. Count on it tomorrow.:)
SORRY FOR BORING YOU. Not an official journal entry yet, but anyway.:)